news

MLB All-Star Game uniforms draw ridicule again

VaselineJuly 18, 2024

0 4 minutes read

MLB All-Star Game uniforms draw ridicule again

ARLINGTON, Texas – It’s almost as if someone within Major League Baseball’s apparel clique decided that they, too, hated the idea of All-Stars wearing generic uniforms to the Midsummer Classic and the only option was to make them stop.

Sabotage.

On Tuesday night, on perhaps the biggest night of the year for sports, a national television audience got a glimpse of the Nike-designed, Fanatics-produced togs. This is America 2024, and we all seem to be living in different realms and in this one, consisting of the small sample of My Twitter Feed and Group Texts, these uniforms are downright rotten.

We’re especially looking at the 2024 American League home passes because they’re a shade that can best be described as The Morning After A Rough Night Out. Not quite creamsicle, not quite brown, and I’m not sure what they were intended for.

A year ago, we explored this topic in Seattle, where Native Americans bought the pretty green uniforms. More importantly, they were a vibe. The home green uniforms evoked evergreen forests, rugged coastlines, overpriced REI outdoor gear, multinational coffee chains. Marines on the road let you know you were, without a doubt, in the Pacific Northwest.

But these 2024 AL fits? You look at the field and see peaches and cream and think, how exactly does this suggest that we’re deep in the heart of Texas?

“I don’t know where it came from. Last year it was kind of like Seattle,” said Mariners right-handed pitcher and AL All-Star Logan Gilbert.

“But this is absolutely unique.”

Why are the National Leaguers actually dressed in black and aqua blue and don’t look like All-Stars, but like the eighth finalists in the battle for the Miami Marlins City Connects draft?

Where am I? Who is that on the field, the AL or the NL? Why do people buy these shirts?

Well, we can at least get the answer to one question. As we wandered the halls of this massive, revenue-generating warehouse, Globe Life Field, a theme became apparent: You could throw almost anything on the shelves and fans, attending a truly once-in-a-lifetime event, would buy it.

“That’s exactly why I bought the jersey,” said Dani Ayala, who made the six-hour drive from Laredo and dressed in a Yankees cap and picked up an unnamed American League jersey. “It’s rare that the All-Star Game is in Texas, or in another state close to home.

“So I decided to get one because I love baseball and it was rare for me to go to an All-Star Game.”

At this point, our most cynical instincts kick in and we imagine that MLB and the Nike-designed, Fanatics-produced (not a good sign if you’ve memorized that boilerplate) jersey industry are telling us to just give them the cheapest, most grimmest jersey possible. Because even at $175 for a jersey and $55 for a hat, they’re flying off the shelves.

And then we met Rob Eitelman, who was standing behind the fence in left field at Globe Life.

The Longview, Texas native and avid Rangers fan not only whipped out his Mastercard — or at least MLB hopes he used the All-Star Game sponsor — to take home a souvenir.

He likes the sweaters. Loves the sweaters.

“I love the design. The colors this year were fantastic. The bright coral colors, even the baby blue colors,” says Eitelman, a drink in his commemorative cup but seemingly completely sober.

“This plan is something we have never seen before.”

For a moment, Eitelman looks like MLB commissioner Rob Manfred’s vision of an ideal customer. And then we look at his feet — and he’s wearing a pair of coral Reeboks.

Large coral man.

“I’ve had them for years,” he says. “I’ve always loved these colors. As much as I love the Rangers, as much as I love the American League and the red, white and blue, these color schemes are different.

“That was what made me buy this shirt. I bought the cap the day they came out. The color schemes were what sold it for me.”

Sigh.

If anyone really wants to see how low they can go with jersey design, and how hard they can test the whims of consumers, consider this the apparel version of The Producers. Are they a big success?

Maybe we’re just old, or stuck in the distant past, or wishing streaming services would unite to create something like cable TV, the wonderful world we grew up in. Alas.

Still, we could choose a better world. On the concourse, one fan wore a 2016 Padres All-Star Game jersey, back when the world was upside down and they wore the local jerseys on Home Run Derby Day and a vaunted version of their regular jerseys during the game.

And that was back when the jerseys were better, period, with nice round numbers and bold letters and didn’t look like a player’s away jersey was wearing 12 ounces of sweat after one inning on a slightly warm day. Nothing compares to the current Nike-designed, Fanatics-produced apparel we see every day of the regular season.

But that train has probably finally left. The consumer has spoken, and he likes to consume, regardless of what the brand he is so loyal to throws on the shelves for $230 for a simple sweater and hat.

On Tuesday, Manfred indicated that the league may revisit the concept of All-Stars wearing their own uniforms in the game. Maybe it will return, as Gilbert of the Mariners remembers from his youth, to players wearing their own uniforms. Maybe not. “It’s all good, either way,” Gilbert says.

And it will certainly make the cash registers ring, regardless of what’s on the shelves for consumers.

“It’s a once-in-a-lifetime thing. Even if we come here every year, this is a once-in-a-lifetime event,” said Samantha Laing of Fort Worth, at the game with her husband, Garrett.

“Orange clashes a bit with me. But I would say nine times out of ten I would buy it.”

VaselineJuly 18, 2024

0 4 minutes read

Vaseline

Related Articles

Mason Greenwood’s dream start to life in France continues after scoring two goals in ONE MINUTE to send new club Marseille to the top of Ligue 1

Talladega NASCAR Xfinity Series results: Sammy Smith wins to advance to next round

Google Like the useful feature: This tool is targeted

Wayne Brady reveals it took a lot of therapy to accept his blended family